"I'm treasured like a piece of dirt"

- forgive me, ida maria

So I got that kiss back. At the worst time possible.

I've learnt my lesson the hard way. I despise how true the phrase "once a cheater always a cheater" applies so well to me.

I'm so very ill. I have a temperature and can barely breathe to save my life. Ironically.
I'm thinking of changing my mind. I can see where Wilma comes from. It's so hard to resist, especially when I do trust him that bit more than I ever have, apart from Joe and Jim. What happened to me happened a long time ago, but that doesn't make it any better. That doesn't mean it didn't have an impact on my life. It did. And as much as I wish someone could understand, they can't. I've experienced it and it hurts a bit when I realise that I am being selfish by letting them in this far and then showing them the mile high brick wall all of a sudden.

I need to sleep, but I need to prove myself first.

Is that ever going to happen?